Drama Bots…

The girl who has been staying with us since the beginning of June is 17, and let me tell ya, the bullshit she deals with regarding friends and boyfriends just solidifies my dislike of the teen years. I hated being a teen when I was a teen. Nobody took me seriously {well, hardly anybody}, and I was surrounded by that ever-present annoying high school bullshit, only it was worse because I was in high school and at least now, while although the clique-ness still exists, we have gotten a little bit more mature in regards to “calling someone out on their shit”, if you know what I mean.

Tonight, roommate had to deal with some more high school drama that totally made my head spin round, and not in a good way at all. Holy crap, are girls really like that? Where are their parents? Honestly??? In my opinion, it’s gotten worse from when I was in high school, and it can only get worse from here. The years that fall away, our society seems to fall into more dismay. Suicides when I was in school were not common, but now? They’re common, and it’s sad.

Parents to teen girls; do you monitor their actions on Facebook? How would you deal with a situation in which your daughter was causing hurtful, spiteful drama and basically bullying another girl? Have you dealt with it before? I’m interested in hearing your answers.

I know that I won’t stand for that kind of crap from Nolan, or any other future kids we may or may not have. Nolan will treat everyone with respect, he will treat everyone as equals. He won’t get a chance to be a bully, because he will know it’s wrong and he will have a happy, fulfilled life.

But then I stop to think, and I wonder…what if I don’t notice it happening? I think the issue is that a lot of parents just simply don’t know their children can be capable of such horrible acts of violence and downright rudeness. Some parents are so busy trying to make money to afford college and opportunities for their kids, that they don’t see what’s in front of them. Are they faulted? I don’t know. It just makes my heart ache to see girls behaving so destructively, and it makes me vow to do anything in my possible power to ensure that it doesn’t happen in our household. For one, Nolan will be a gentleman; he won’t look at women as sexual objects, but as people. Too many young males these days think women are placed on Earth for them to oogle and make rude sexual comments too {I see it every where I go, and it’s gross}. My kid? Will not be that way.

These teens, they are so obsessed with sexuality and their sexual experience. It makes me cringe. Why are they always in such a rush to grow up? Why can’t they just hold on tight to all their innocence as long as possible? Why is it the norm for a 17-year-old to have more sexual partners than years in existence? Teen girls aren’t the only ones to blame, of course, teen boys are just as guilty…busy chasing ‘tail’ and objectifying women, as I’ve said. It’s sad, and heartbreaking, and makes me want to hide in a hole or homeschool or something.

I think that, for the most part, teens are trying to live mature lives that they aren’t actually developmentally ready to handle. Sex, especially young teen sex, can destroy a person. I remember my first time…I was 16, he was my first boyfriend, and when he dumped me 3 months later and told me I was just another notch in the bed, I was absolutely crushed. I didn’t give myself away easily after that, and I was destroyed for months. I couldn’t stop crying, and was depressed because I felt as if I had tossed away the most important, sacred thing into the hands of someone who used me as an emotional and physical garbage can for waste.

And, it’s scary…especially when people who are 5 years younger than me have a “list” {list of people you’ve slept with} that reaches the double digits.

And believe me, I know that not all teens are like that. I wasn’t, and I knew many who weren’t. I know many who aren’t…BUT, the majority of them? Scare the hell out of me.

Thinking about this now, I’ve got to say it has to be hormones and bad decisions…but still, I don’t remember hormones making me that crazy. So, it’s gotta be a little bit more right?

Bah. Thank God I’m 21…

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15 Comments

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15 responses to “Drama Bots…

  1. I am TERRIFIED of teens. That’s not even a strong enough word. I do NOT want my kids to be teenagers.

  2. Blaine

    It’s so scary. I’m 27 (in 2 days, anyway) and am soooo glad I am not in high school anymore.

    I dread some of the talks I might have to have with my kids, about respect, about treating people with dignity and well, about responsibility with their friends and girlfriends.

    I think the worst part is that we all remember hiding a lot from our parents, and honestly, at the time, being proud that we were getting away with so much, and pretending to be better when we were around our parents.

    Our kids are most likely going to do the same, but I still plan to have those talks with my kidlets about how every single person out there deserves your respect, and it is not okay to EVER make fun of anyone.

    The shy girl in class might be abused, the smart kid might have a sick parent, you NEVER KNOW. Everyone has their own battles they are fighting, and it’s never cool to judge by the cover.

    I hate to admit my first sexual encounter was younger than yours, by um, a couple/few years. (I’m not specifying, but I’ll just say it was WAY too young.) BUT, my number is not double digit. Heck, I was embarrassed that it’s 6. I can’t believe teens these days are eager to get notches. They are all going to be disease ridden. It’s just sad. Well, sad and terrifying.

    AND THIS? IS WHY KIDS NEED PARENTS. Not television to raise them, not babysitters, they need a parent to make sure they are guided in the right direction. I intend to be a Stay At Home Mom as often as possible. I might get a part time job or volunteer, once the kids are in school, but I want to be around when they get home from school, to converse with them and know them.

    This is exactly why I have a paranoid friend who intends to homeschool her children and basically shelter them because she’s afraid of what they might do. But that to me seems about as smart as the strict Catholic schools. (No offense meant to anyone who is Catholic.) I went to Catholic schools. There was more sex, drugs, drinking and very young pregnancies at the Catholic school, by far, than at the public schools.

    I think we just have to try our best, talk to them about how to be safe, respectful, and responsible. And cross our fingers.

    • you WHORE lmfao just kidding, you’ve only got one on me lmfao.

      But honestly? Great outlook. I won’t be sheltering Nolan, but I’ll be talking to him about EVERYTHING. I want to be a SAHM simply so I know him too, you know?

      You’re so right and wise, oh right and wise one ❤

      • Blaine

        First you call me a whore, then you compliment me. Hmmm. lol

        Thanks (for the compliment)!

        And technically one of them shouldn’t even count, since, well, it was one time, although if we’re getting technical, it was less than HALF of a time, and um, how should I put this? Um… I could barely feel anything. Like think of one of your fingers. lol So, yeah.

        I guess my number is 5 and a half. lol

      • Well if we’re doing the whole “didn’t even count” came then like 2 of mine didn’t even count so my number is at 3. LMFAO.

  3. I don’t think the majority of teens have that many partners. I think teens & young adults think it’s cool to have sex & therefor LIE about how many people they have had sex with.

    Unluckily for my kids, I know the tricks. I am 27 but have a memory like a steel trap. I can remember conversations verbatim from when I was 10. And I? Got away with a lot. Even with VERY strict & wonderful parents. My parents were divorced and my father is a police sergeant in the city I grew up in. But I know the tricks & my kids won’t get away with much.

    However I think saying you won’t permit your child to do things is a bit shortsighted. Kids do what kids do sometimes regardless of the amazing home lives we give them. I had everything I ever wanted as a child. I had supportive & loving parents who took care of my every need while I had a full time job throughout high school to support my wants.

    None of that prevented me from smoking cigarettes trying drugs or having sex at 14 years old. (granted, I am STILL with my very first) I was probably considered a bully or at least somewhat scary in high school & I definitely picked on kids. My parents knew me very well. They knew what kind of person I was- which was a really good person. But, kids do stupid shit. Sometimes outside of the character you teach them.

    Although, you are probably more mature at your age, but when I was 21? Oh man. I was probably at my very worst in regards to my behavior.

    So to sum up: (lol)
    I am also afraid of teenagers.
    But you can’t bullshit a bullshitter.
    So I’m good.
    Also?
    I know that my kids will be good people.
    But they may have sex and try drugs and all that.
    And I will be OK with that because they will know their own limits.
    And I will have a very open dialogue with my kids.
    And if they fall I will be there to catch them.
    Because regardless of your home life children sometimes make mistakes.
    But they have to learn from their own mistakes.
    Not from us telling them.

    • You’re probably right about the lying about partners thing, but I do know some who are literally telling the truth and it makes me cringe lol.

      You’re also right about kids making stupid decisions but still being good, smart people. I’ve made my few share, although nothing major!

      And I wasn’t exactly a bullshitter, so I don’t know the tricks! In other words; I’m screwed, aren’t I?? haha. I’m also going to keep an open dialogue with mine, I want them to know everything and the effects of everything {drugs, sex at a young age, all that jazz}, and ~ as you said ~ I will be there if they fall to help them back up again.

      they have to learn from their own mistakes, not from us telling them

      well that? That’s something I’m gonna need to remember and drill into my head! I have a bad habit of trying to tell the younger generation how not to mess up in life. LOL!

  4. I’m 25 and high school was so far back. Here, we didn’t even know if this stuff was happening. In my country, hold hands and they tell you you’ll ger pregnant (ok I’m exagerrating, but we’re a little conservative out here so by the time we go to getting naughty, we were in college :P)
    But I see where you’re coming from and my mother, who is a school principal is dealing with some major FB drama right now ans it’s driving her absolutely nuts. She’s thankful that her children were teenagers in the 90s! 🙂

  5. Sunshine and Daydreams

    I am terrified of my son getting to his teen years. He’s only 7 now, but already likes to gab on the phone. Eek!

    Although I am 32, I still remember all the tricks and lies I pulled, even though my parents were ok with alot of stuff. I still remember calling my mom one night at a party to come pick me up because I was too drunk to drive. Instead of being mad at me for drinking to much, she would happy to get me because I knew not to drive. I want to be like that with my son too. While yes, he may get in trouble for some things, I want to put an emphasis on being responsible and telling the truth. If he screws up, to admit it and deal with the consequences.

    I see so many young adults who aren’t capable of doing that. If something goes wrong, it is always someone else’s fault or beyond their control. Not saying it never is someone else fault, but alot of the time its yours and you need to live up to that. I think if I can instill that, I will be doing good.

  6. You could not PAY me to go back to high school. I soooo agree with you! It’s full of drama and B.S. I recently reconnected with my first boyfriend and those memories kept flooding back in a bad way.

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