Category Archives: changes

An Announcement

I was going to keep this a secret for a while, but I’m terribly bad at secrets. It’s a proven fact. Especially about “exciting” things, I just can’t keep my flap closed. And since Matt is also having a horrible time keeping this secret, I figured…why not?

That’s right folks, two lines…we’re pregnant! Apparently, I’m Fertile Myrtle.

We decided in December that we were ready to add to our little family, so I finished up my BC cycle and went off it in January. Then we started “trying”. By “trying”, I of course mean we just did it a bunch of times, as per usual, and WHAMBAM. Pregnancy? Matt is going to buy me a Staples “that was easy” button and duct tape it to my belly, because…well, that was easy?

We found out February 5th, 2011. I went to a walk in clinic on Wednesday night and they confirmed it. I’m just two days shy of five weeks, and my estimated due date is October 16th, 2011. I am absolutely excited about having an October baby, and…dare I say it…but I’m hoping the baby will be born on October 21st, my dad’s birthday! I doubt that the doctors would let me go five days past my due date, but it’d be sweet to give him a birthday grandbaby!

I know that most women don’t breathe a word of their pregnancy until they are passed the 12th week point. The doctor at the walk in clinic was kind enough to remind me {every time he opened his mouth} that there is a 1 in 5 chance for miscarriage, and he was kind enough to tell me not to “tell everybody just yet”. Nice huh? Definitely doesn’t help calm my nerves at all about this whole pregnancy thing.  But the way I see it…either way, I’m going to blog about the results. I’m over the fear that telling people will “jinx” my pregnancy – I’m not even high risk for a miscarriage! Stressing about that isn’t good anyway. Besides, I spilled the beans about my pregnancy with Nolan just a mere days after finding out, and I was around 5 weeks then too.

We’ve alerted the troops {family} and some close friends, and now I’m alerting all of you. Deep breath.

I was going to wait until I was a little further along…but frankly? Keeping this a “secret” is pretty damn tiring. It’s happy news, so why not share it?! Not to mention, I’ve already “popped” a bit, and it’s already a little noticeable…

I didn’t look like that until about 20 weeks with Nolan! Crazy huh? I know, with your second you pop quickly so I’m trying not to get too offended by the fact that I can barely see my box when I sit down to pee and I’m only four {nearly five} weeks.

I’m super excited! This is our first “planned” pregnancy, but I feel as clueless as I did with Nolan! Seriously, it’s shocking just how much you forget about being pregnant until you’re pregnant again. I didn’t expect to be so exhausted {hence my lazy last couple of weeks}. I didn’t expect the dreams to start so early, either. I’m eating enough to feed a small village too. Thank goodness the nausea hasn’t set in! Although the smell {and look!} of fish is more than enough to turn my belly completely inside out. Of course, the look and smell of fish has always turned my stomach! Gross!!!

I’m also super impatient. How in the hell was I pregnant before? I’m impatient for my first ultrasound, to hear little bean’s heart beat, and to find out what sex little bean is. Boy or girl, it will most definitely be loved! Although I do have a secret desire for a girl, only because Matt says this is our LAST baby and I would like to have a daughter too. Boys are amazing, don’t get me wrong, but I’m hoping for that little girl – the outfits, the girly things, watching her be daddy’s little girl…so sweet! Plus it’s due time someone on Matt’s side had a girl!!! But if little bean happens to be a boy, then so be it! I’ll be just as happy with two little boys as I would be with a girl and a boy.

So, there you have it! There’s my big secret 😀 our big secret! Nolan’s known for quite some time. He keeps rubbing/tapping my belly and saying “baybeee!” So cute!

I have a feeling the next 9 months are going to fly by.

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Take THAT, apartment!!!

Over the past little while, I haven’t been on top of my “domestic duties”, so to speak. I know, this confession is shocking coming from me, huh? The one who actually believes in the 50s housewife mindset {to a degree, anyway}. But it’s true! I’ve been slacking, and then some! The soles of my slippers are caked in squished raisins – and that tells you about the cleanliness of my kitchen floor right there.

For the past week, I’ve been super lazy and tired. I think my iron is low – actually I know my iron is low. I don’t get nearly enough red meats, nor do I eat anything else high in iron. So I’ve been lazy, spending most of my afternoons doing nothing but cuddling up my baby boy and reading stories to him. During his nap time, I also nap…or have been, anyway. Our bedroom was a laundry war-zone, piles of dirty scattered about on the floor and baskets of clean stacked high to the ceiling. I was too lazy to fold the clean laundry, and thus didn’t have any baskets for the dirty laundry. Nor did I have any room in the baskets for more clean laundry so I couldn’t just toss it into the washer and dryer to get rid of it. No, that would mean that I would actually have to fold some of the clean clothes. I did manage to stay on top of the dishes, more or less. After all, we don’t have a dish washer and even at my most laziest moments I can’t stand having dirty dishes in my sink. So, go me for that at least!

Yeah, I’ve been the definition of lazy. Even my blogging indicates that, and that’s totally okay. We’re all entitled to moments {er, in my case, weeks} of laziness. I prefer to call it “weeks of rest”, thank you very much.

In any case, I’ve broken out of the fog spell and slapped myself upside the head. I am the one who does the majority of the cleaning {okay, all of it – although hubs does help me tidy up toys in the evening}, because I am the one that gets bothered most by mess and dirty things. I’ve mentioned thousands of times before that Matt does not see messes the way I see them. He’s blind to them. They don’t exist. The man will cook a fantastic dinner, but leave all of the dishes on the counter. I’m lucky if some of them make it into the sink. So, if I’m the only one who does all the majority of the cleaning, you can bet your socks that our apartment needed my love and attention. So this morning, I gave it just that.

A huge chore for me was the recycling under the sink. We have a little blue recycling bin that is supposed to be taken out to our big recycling bin outside when it gets full. However, our big recycling bin is currently buried under tons of snow, I’ve attempted to make Matt dig it out several times before but according to him “it’s frozen to the ground and if he tries to get it out the bottom will come out.” So, we technically don’t have the use of a big recycling bin. I keep forgetting to go to Walmart and pick up a new one {that will we store in Matt’s truck cab}, not to mention Matt missed recycling this week. {He claims it doesn’t matter, because he didn’t have anything to put all the recycling in anyway – since our big bin is, again, buried}. Trust me when I say that the recycling literally piled up to the point where you couldn’t even open the cupboard doors under the sink without tons of it falling out at you. And I kept leaving it, thinking that Matt would deal with it. Pfft, yeah right! Matt deal with a mess?!? Even with my constant bitching about it, it stayed under the sink. He kept saying “oh, I’ll put it all in bags and put it in the back of my truck for now”.

Guess what I did today? I put all of the recycling in bags and then brought it out to Matt’s truck and tossed it in the cab. Now, the cupboard under my sink looks exactly how it’s supposed to…like this:

And Matt’s truck cab is loaded up with bags full of recycling, waiting for the day when we finally get our asses to Walmart to buy a new big recycling bin. Which, if I have anything to do with it, will be happening very soon. I think it looks really trashy {snort, trash…get it!?} and I want that dealt with ASAP. While it brings me such joy to see Matt’s truck cab full of recycling, that joy is dampened by the facts that a) he doesn’t drive his truck during the winter so what kind of punishment is that anyway? and b) as I said, it’s totally trashy and I hate trashy.

So, yeah. That was a huge chore for me this morning. Plus I cleaned the entire kitchen and washed the floors {and picked all the squished raisins off my slippers}. Then I cleaned the bathroom and our bedroom. I’m catching up on laundry {nearly there!} and I’ve vacuumed the livingroom. Our apartment is slowly being restored to it’s original glory, and I love it!

I don’t know why I allow myself to get in lazy moods like that. It doesn’t happen often, but when it does the mood drags on and on and on. Seriously, weeks of laziness? What the hell, me?

I’m glad I finally gave our apartment some tender loving and care, since Matt would like to have his college friend, G, and G’s girlfriend over for a “fondue party” tomorrow night. I’m game because chocolate fondue is bomb! And yes, I know, I should have recruited his help because he wants to have the fondue party, but guess what? I’m sure I’ll be making him clean something in preparation for this “fondue party” – our apartment never stays clean for long!

When I say that Matt doesn’t see messes the way that I see them, I mean simply that. He doesn’t see them. If I tell him to clean something, he’ll do it. I know, the recycling was just him being super lazy and probably unable to see how or where we could store all that recycling without pissing off our landlords {he was thinking truck bed, I was thinking truck cab}.

The best thing about being a stay-at-home-mom is that I only have myself to report to. Matt is completely fine with messes. I, on the other hand, not so much. So the only person I piss off when I get lazy is myself. I don’t piss off any managers or bosses, and I don’t loose my job for slacking. So basically, I can be lazy and still “have a job”. It’s awesome. Plus when I’m feeling lazy and not wanting to clean, it just gives me even more time to read stories to Nolan and play with him. We’ve had tons of snuggles this week!

Oh and by the way, I found Nolan’s other snow boot…it was stuck in his snow pants. So Nolan didn’t actually lose it at all. Mom fail? Totally. Oh well, he doesn’t seem bothered by the misguided blame at all 😉

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A {Very Sad} Letter to BlackBerries {specifically mine}

Dear BlackBerry:

I love you. I’ve loved you since the first time I held you in the Bell store, not even two months ago. You were far prettier and faster than my old BlackBerry, and you had wireless capabilities. I treat you like a queen, you practically sit on a royal cushion day after day. The kind of treatment you get is actually quite ridiculous.

And yet, randomly, you refuse to lock. I now am that person who butt calls everyone. You refuse to ring, no matter what setting you’re on. You refuse to sound the alarm should I set it. I don’t know what I ever did to wrong you, to hurt you…but you’re hurting me by acting up so quickly into our relationship. I thought we were meant to be! I even paid extra for your pretty self! But now you mock me by not working.

A girl needs a lock button, and a girl needs to be able to hear her phone should it ring {or the alarm, should it go off}. I’m worried about our future together…if this is happening just two months into our relationship…well, I have reason to worry. Obviously, I now have to take you all the way in to a Bell store and send you off for repairs. But I’m worried those repairs won’t fix the future issues, I’m worried that as soon as your warranty wears out, you will fall to the same fate my last BlackBerry did. I’m worried all the issues I’ll have with you will cause me to go literally insane.

You know, I renewed my contract with Bell for another three years to get you. I thought for sure that BlackBerry had improved their phones, since everyone else I talked to had no issues with it. But alas, here we are…you’re not ringing, nor are you locking. I butt dialed six people already today. Luckily they were all Matt, but still. You didn’t get dropped, you didn’t get thrown, you didn’t get left out in the freezing cold of my car. You are treated like a celebrity. I’m beginning to think you’ve got Lindsay Lohan’s personality: despite all the allowances you have, you’re still a drunken mess.

I hope that when I take you in for repairs, it solves all of our issues together. Otherwise, I’m going to have to replace you again. Only this time? I’ll replace you with an iPhone. Yeah, I went there.

Love,
Your owner with the broken-heart:
Jess

P.S. I really don’t want an iPhone, I want you, but I want and need you to work properly. We’re in this together, for three years.

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I’m Bored. Again.

I’m bored with this blog, again. It just feels…blah. I don’t know what to do in order to bring it back alive. I’m too lazy to re-do the whole look ~ besides, I like the look. I’m pretty sure it’s just me. My writing feels dry and boring lately. Sorry for that.

There’s a lot of stuff that I’d love to write about, but I feel like I can’t. I have fears that writing these stories would open myself up to opinions and feedback that I frankly don’t want. So I remain hush hush about it, and reframe from writing. About that, anyway.

Winter is boring, and in turn I feel boring. We haven’t gone on any great adventures, we haven’t done anything miraculously fun. We mostly stay home, because it’s too bloody cold to go anywhere fun. Sure, there’s the mall, but it’s totally depressing when you go and don’t buy anything because it’s not in your budget and we’re on a saving rampage, so what’s the point? Our mall doesn’t even have a fun playground, or even a photobooth to waste time in. It’s just stores and a food court. Oh joy.

I long for spring, so that we can go to the park and actually do something fun. I’m totally dying here of cabin fever and boredom and there’s nothing I can do about it. I’d love to be able to jet down to visit family for a bit and just have a change of scenery, but Matt’s in school 5 days a week and I work 4 days a week. My only day off is Wednesday, smack dab in the middle of the week. I suppose I could leave Friday afternoon, and head back up Monday morning, but the drive is always sketchy. We have to go through several storm belts and I’m sure I’ve expressed my fear and anxiety about driving during snow storms of any sort.

If it wasn’t so bloody expensive to take a train, I would, and if it didn’t take all day to bus down, I would.

I’m missing my family and my friends, and I’m bored with everything right now. I’m in a funk that I’m trying to claw my way out of. Nobody willingly wants to be in a funk, it just sort of happens. Am I right?

I know the groundhog didn’t see his shadow and predicted that “spring would be here before we know it“, but I highly doubt that’s true. I wait for spring to be here every minute of the day…but it’s only the beginning of February. We had snow storms in early May last year.

Clearly, Northern living is not for this mama. But I do like this town…when it’s not covered in snow and ice and other winter yuckiness. And I am trying to suck it up. I know people {JD especially, or maybe only} hate when I complain about snow since I live in Northern Ontario. Snow is just a fact of life. And I do deal with it pretty well, for the most part. I like never complain to Matt or my family or anybody except you poor folks. Sorry about that. I know if I complain about how cold and boring it is here, Matt will feel super bad. It’s not his fault I suck at Northern winter living. Northern spring and summer living? Totally rad. There is so much to do here it’s a bit ridiculous. But there’s not really anything fun to do during the winter months, and the winter months drag on and on because of it.

This Saturday, I’m going to take Nolan to the EYC. Even though I find Saturday’s at the EYC to be extremely overwhelming {there are so many people}, I think we need to get out of the house for a little bit. So, I’ll grab a coffee and suck it up. Nolan doesn’t mind crowds, even if I do. And since we don’t have plans for Saturday, why not?!

Blarg. Sorry for being so dry and boring around here. My blog is beginning to resemble my hands! So dry. My hands aren’t boring but winter sure is.

P.S. Did I mention I am not a fan of winter?

P.S.S. I fully expect some hate-comments from JD for this post. But oh well; I’m sure she’s just as tired of trying to navigate snowy, icy sidewalks with a baby stroller. And the bundling up before any outing, no matter how quick.

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A bunch of random updates

Alright; enough with the weather complaints. Winter is here, and it probably will be for quite some time – as much as I hate it, I don’t think my hate-on is going to make it disappear any sooner.

So yeah, it’s time for some random updates! I obviously need to snap out of my winter induced funk 😉

I didn’t really do much of anything today, besides watching the girls and hanging with my little man. The girls got dropped off at 7:45, and since Matt didn’t have class until later, he stayed inside with Nolan while I walked with J and T down to J’s bus. I love Tuesdays’ because I don’t have to worry about carting Nolan out in the cold.

I always wear my snow pants, my winter coat, my hat, my mitts and my scarf – but I always feel so awkward because there is another girl who waits at J’s bus stop. She’s in grade 7 or something, but she never wears any winter gear {aside from a winter coat}. It just reminds me of my middle school and high school days. I never wore any of that stuff because it just “wasn’t cool”. So am I suddenly “uncool” because I don’t want to freeze my ass off in -30 weather?

Whatever. The funny thing is, I don’t even care anymore.

So yeah; we basically spent the entire day inside, watching movies and playing with toys. Because that’s all there is to do around this stankin’ town in the winter time. I need to ask T’s mom to drop off her car seat on Tuesdays so we can at least go to the coffee group. It’ll give us one day a week when we can get out of the house, right? Even if I’m totally a hermit right now because of this weather.

But I’m getting incredibly bored of just colouring. So I need y’all to suggest some toddler friendly {and, more importantly, inexpensive} activities, since I’m far too uncreative at this moment to think of some on my own. I want to make homemade playdough, but I’m still searching out for a really good recipe. {If you have one, PLEASE give it to me!! I’m looking for an easy recipe, one that T can help me do and that doesn’t require a hell of a lot of ingredients…in relation: why the hell does tarter sauce have to be in playdough?!?!}.

Also: Nolan did a lot of super cute things today. For one: he napped. For the first time in like 2 days. It was fabulous! And even though he napped, he spent a majority of the afternoon cuddling with me on the couch under a warm blanket. He’s done that the last two days in a row, but I thought it was only because he had skipped out on his nap both days. But now I’m beginning to think that he is starting to enjoy cuddling with mama again, and that makes me so incredibly happy. 😀

He played quietly while I made dinner, and at one point when I peaked into the livingroom he was looking under the couch pointing and saying “CAT! HHAAHAHA CAT!” Sketch was trying to hide from him, and he was trying to play with her. Super cute.

Nolan ate his dinner like a champ, but kept demanding the soy sauce. At one point he threw quite the epic tantrum when I told him “you have enough soy sauce on your food”. Yes, that is apparently starting. Joy to the world, right!? After that he decided that he was done with eating, so I put him on the ground to play in the kitchen while I finished eating my dinner. He ran back and forth from the refrigerator to the washer with his little magnetic letters, screaming and giggling like a mad man. T’was hilarious!

Then it was bath time; I had the bathroom door closed and was running Nolan’s bath while Matt was in the livingroom with Nolan. They heard me start the bath and they both came running to the door and started knocking on it. Matt told Nolan to say “Mommy, I’m ready!” and Nolan totally screamed “READY!”

I let him into the bathroom, and he raced over to the tub saying “ready, ready!”. And even while I bathed him and, later dressed him, he kept saying “ready Mommy! Ready!” it was the cutest thing ever. “Ready” is such a cute word when it comes from his mouth!

Yeah, Nolan’s awesome! And even though it’s freakin’ cold out and I’m tired of snow, life is awesome. Because Nolan is in it. 🙂

Tomorrow is my “day off”. I’m heading to the gym for 9am, working out for a bit and then doing my Fit Fix Orientation. I was supposed to do that orientation tonight, but I totally forgot about it. No harm though, I’ll do it tomorrow 🙂 I’m going to try and do 20 minutes on the {sit down} bike, but I’ll stick to 15 minutes on the two ellipticals and the up-right bike. I don’t want to overdo it too much, considering I’ll be going to the gym on Thursday too {since I’m missing Friday}. Also: I’m going to try to shower at the gym. JDC gave me flip flops so I really don’t have an excuse. I just have to remember to pack a change of under hahha. It’s totally painfully obvious just how much of a novice I am at this whole “gym” thing.

T-minus three days until my date with the tattoo gun.

{P.S. How do you like that, two posts in like 10 minutes of each other. Guess I’m not as “cricket-y” as I thought! Sorry they sorta suck. I’m totally exhausted}

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WEEEE!!!

Holy cow am I ever exhausted right now!! I’m at the holy-hyper part of exhaustion.

I kicked today’s ass, if I do say so myself. I woke up at 7am, got out of bed, got the little man and myself some breakfast and then got us both dressed. Before heading to the gym, I had to run a quick errand to pay our hydro bill. We were at the gym by 9:45am, and I actually found a parking spot up front! Usually, I have to park in the parking lot on the other side of the road – which I was dreading doing because today was freezing and it was my first day bringing Nolan to the gym with me.

I dropped Nolan off at the little daycare inside the gym and went to put my stuff in a locker. I was totally nervous about working out on my own but it wasn’t so bad! The only “bad” parts were not having someone there to distract me with conversation. I kept watching the clock, trying to power through my workout routine. My workout routine is basically 15 minutes on four of the cardio machines. I skipped the upright bike because my ass still hurt from last time and Matt made me promise I’d take it easier on myself. This is, after all, my first time exercising. I listened to my music and just zoned out, trying to get into it and enjoy the whole “working out” thing. As odd as it sounds…I didn’t enjoy it until I started to sweat. I did feel a bit discouraged by the lack of “calories” I was burning {basically 60 per machine, so only 180 calories}.

But at this point, I’m not doing this whole gym/workout thing to burn tons of calories and lose weight. I’m doing it because I want more energy, and I want to feel better about myself. This is only the beginning, after all, and I’m still a novice.

Anyway, so I powered my way though my workout and then went back to the change room. I was going to shower, but honestly? Public showers totally intimate me. I also didn’t have any flip flops. And stuff. So I skipped the shower, got dressed and went to pick up my little man.

The daycare ladies told me that Nolan was such a little sweetheart. He was gentle with the other babies – most of them significantly younger than he is – and didn’t get upset when any of the other babies cried. Most babies get upset when other babies cry, I guess. Not Nolan! He actually went over and tried to help cheer up each crying baby. How sweet!!! I’m so proud of my little bug! I definitely won’t be nervous about leaving him in the daycare anymore 😉 he’s a champ!

I decided to go to Winners and see if I could buy a sports bra. I forgot the reason why I don’t normally go into Winners: I freaking love it. I spent a ridiculously long time in the purse section, the home decor section, and the kitchen section. I found a lamp that I totally fell in love with and really wanted to buy but didn’t because I went in for a sports bra, but if it’s there when we get some extra money I’m going to buy it. It was royal purple with a light purple design on it – it would look great in our bedroom.

I did buy a sports bra, but I couldn’t try it on because I had Nolan with me, so I “guessed” on my size. I always forget when bra shopping that the sizes are based on waist I mean ribcage {I assure you I do not have titties down to my waist…yet, anyway}, not “cup” size. I bought a small sports bra. HAHAHA. I can’t even do up the damn thing. While my “cup” size is small, my waist ribcage size is definitely not. So I have to return it and see if I can get one in a bigger size. In addition to the bra, I bought two reusable water bottles for Matt and I and a plate with two compartments for Nolan.

Then I decided to take Nolan out for lunch, since it was already past his regular lunch time and running into naptime. We had A&W at the mall. I know, I’m horrible…I basically “undid” everything I may have achieved at the gym. But it was worth it; I love lunch dates with Nolan. He cracks me up!

After lunch, I quickly jetted to my SMIL’s to pick up some mail, then we headed home. I guess Nolan snoozed for the 10 minute drive, and woke up when we pulled into the drive way. Then he refused to nap – for a second day in a row. I gave it a fair shot too, but all he did was run back and forth in his crib and jump all around in it.

It really sucked, because I was so hoping to get in a nap myself before the girls arrived. But hey, you win some you lose some right? So I went and got my little jumping bean from his crib and we came out into the livingroom. I was so feeling lazy so I turned on the TV and laid down on the couch. Guess who joined me a few moments later?

I must say, these cuddles made up for all the frustration I was feeling for not getting a nap!

So, yeah, that was our day! It was pretty nice. It would have been better if I could have seen JD in person 😦

AND GUESS WHAT?!

I’m getting a tattoo on Friday!!!

WEEEE!

I’m so totally excited!!!

And no, you can’t hear what it’s going to be because it’s a SECRET until the time of. Except for those people I told already, you can know. Everybody else has to wait for the pictures 🙂

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The Orientation

So tonight, as I fretted earlier, I had my first orientation at the gym. It was all about learning how to use the cardio machines. Matt ended up staying home with Nolan, but I still left early so I could get a parking spot without any trouble. I arrived at the gym at 5pm – half an hour before the orientation. I went in and nervously waited about. It was nerve-wracking, I felt like everybody was staring at me {they weren’t}. I felt like I was “dressed wrong” {I was wearing my gray leggings, a blue thank top and a black shirt overtop with my dark gray hoodie}. I just felt…self conscious. Big surprise, right? So…I ended up hiding out in the change room, desperately texting my friend Sammi to see when she’d get there.

Only she told me her class was running late.

Insert panic attack.

I steadied myself out by taking a few deep breaths and saying I can do this over and over again. A couple of messages exchanged with Caitlin helped out too, as well as tweeting my anxiety away haha.

So, I stayed, and I went to the orientation and I learned how to use the machines. I even burned a whole 11 calories! WEEE!

I wanted to stay out and workout for a bit, but once I went to my locker {with the spiffy key lock Matt bought me guarding my valuables! I love that very thoughtful man} to text Sammi and see if she was coming or not, all the machines I wanted to use were already in use. After 5pm is the busy time of the night – everyone’s getting off work or out of school.

But the important thing is I went tonight. I was scared shitless, but I did it.

I’m going tomorrow too! I made a commitment to myself {and the gym} that I would go every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for sure. So after T gets picked up {around 10:30}, I will be going to the gym to get my workout on. I still don’t know if I’m bringing Nolan – normally on Friday’s I would because Matt is usually in school, but tomorrow he doesn’t have his classes because his teacher will be out-of-town. But Matt is going ice fishing with his friends, and he’s not sure if they’re leaving before noon or after. So we’ll see!

I’m also going to the gym on Saturday morning for another orientation – this one is for stretching! I’m pretty excited to learn how to stretch {properly}.

SWING!

When I came home tonight, I was so exhausted and I didn’t even do a proper workout! Matt and I got our little man into bed, then we both decided a nap was in serious order before Jersey Shore. I was so exhausted, it was pretty ridiculous. Then and again, I’ve had several late nights this week…staying up late, watching crappy TV with Matt or just reading blogs. I’ve got to put a stop to that!! I need to make sure my ass is in bed at 9pm on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. YES I AM TOTALLY BASING MY EARLY BEDTIMES ON THE TV SCHEDULE, SO SUE ME. I love watching Teen Mom 2 {Tuesday nights}, Greys Anatomy and Jersey Shore {Thursdays}. I think Much Music will start playing Vampire Diaries on Friday nights at 9…hopefully…so that I can still get to bed for 10 haha.

I know it’s pretty bad to plan your sleeping around the TV, but those are our “date shows”. Matt and I snuggle on the couch and enjoy a couple of hours of mindless reality or complex medical drama. 🙂

In addition to going to the gym today {!!!! so proud of myself haha}, I also recorded everything I ate on a piece of paper. I need to start an actual food journal, but for now this works. I had four monster sized glasses of water today, people! And I had a small snack or meal every 2 hours. I’m still not sure how to actually keep a food journal, but here’s what I have written down on my “food paper”:

7:30am – small glass of orange juice
8:30am – tea
9:00am – 1 piece of toast with peanut butter
9:20am – tall glass of water
9:30am – {another} tall glass of water
10:12am – a banana 🙂
10:30am – tall glass of water
11:30am – small bowl of alphagettis and a piece of bread with butter {bad, I know}
1:3opm – two granola bars
4:30pm – tall glass of water
4:40pm – homemade mac & cheese
9:00pm – handful of chips
9:20pm – milkshake with vanilla ice cream, vanilla yogurt, fruit and a spoonful of hot chocolate mix 😉

So yay! I sort of got a little naughty when I got home from the gym, I know. I should have eaten something right away but I was so exhausted I just crashed and when I woke up I was way too lazy to make anything so I grabbed the nearest thing to me – chips.

I’m still waiting to hear back from the trainer about my Personal Health Profile. Once they give me a better idea of what I should be eating for my weight loss/workout goals, I’ll be able to make a meal plan up that I can {hopefully} stick to. I’m going to cut the pasta down a bit in my diet. Usually, we eat pasta like 4 times a week {I know, I know}. I’m going to cut that number down too…one time a week. And that’s totally going to kill me, because I love pasta, but I’ll take it because I don’t want to have pasta completely gone from my life at this point 😦 haha.

Matt’s workout goals are totally opposite to mine. I want to lose some weight and tone up, and he wants to bulk up so his diet needs to have more carbs. Nolan also needs to put some weight on, so he’ll be sticking to a high-in-carbs diet too. Which means I’m going to have to eat more salads and fruits, and grilled chicken, while my boys get to have more fun. Lord help me! I am so bad at giving in to things.

But honestly? I am totally excited about this new chapter. I’m totally exhausted, yes, but I’m hoping it will be worth it and I’m hoping my body will adjust and I’ll have more energy to do things that I love.

I just wanted to say thanks for all the words of encouragement thus far! I don’t have a workout buddy yet {because I’m not sure about Sammi’s schedule vs mine}, but at least I have the Interwebz to keep me motivated 😉

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