Category Archives: uncensored

An Announcement

I was going to keep this a secret for a while, but I’m terribly bad at secrets. It’s a proven fact. Especially about “exciting” things, I just can’t keep my flap closed. And since Matt is also having a horrible time keeping this secret, I figured…why not?

That’s right folks, two lines…we’re pregnant! Apparently, I’m Fertile Myrtle.

We decided in December that we were ready to add to our little family, so I finished up my BC cycle and went off it in January. Then we started “trying”. By “trying”, I of course mean we just did it a bunch of times, as per usual, and WHAMBAM. Pregnancy? Matt is going to buy me a Staples “that was easy” button and duct tape it to my belly, because…well, that was easy?

We found out February 5th, 2011. I went to a walk in clinic on Wednesday night and they confirmed it. I’m just two days shy of five weeks, and my estimated due date is October 16th, 2011. I am absolutely excited about having an October baby, and…dare I say it…but I’m hoping the baby will be born on October 21st, my dad’s birthday! I doubt that the doctors would let me go five days past my due date, but it’d be sweet to give him a birthday grandbaby!

I know that most women don’t breathe a word of their pregnancy until they are passed the 12th week point. The doctor at the walk in clinic was kind enough to remind me {every time he opened his mouth} that there is a 1 in 5 chance for miscarriage, and he was kind enough to tell me not to “tell everybody just yet”. Nice huh? Definitely doesn’t help calm my nerves at all about this whole pregnancy thing.  But the way I see it…either way, I’m going to blog about the results. I’m over the fear that telling people will “jinx” my pregnancy – I’m not even high risk for a miscarriage! Stressing about that isn’t good anyway. Besides, I spilled the beans about my pregnancy with Nolan just a mere days after finding out, and I was around 5 weeks then too.

We’ve alerted the troops {family} and some close friends, and now I’m alerting all of you. Deep breath.

I was going to wait until I was a little further along…but frankly? Keeping this a “secret” is pretty damn tiring. It’s happy news, so why not share it?! Not to mention, I’ve already “popped” a bit, and it’s already a little noticeable…

I didn’t look like that until about 20 weeks with Nolan! Crazy huh? I know, with your second you pop quickly so I’m trying not to get too offended by the fact that I can barely see my box when I sit down to pee and I’m only four {nearly five} weeks.

I’m super excited! This is our first “planned” pregnancy, but I feel as clueless as I did with Nolan! Seriously, it’s shocking just how much you forget about being pregnant until you’re pregnant again. I didn’t expect to be so exhausted {hence my lazy last couple of weeks}. I didn’t expect the dreams to start so early, either. I’m eating enough to feed a small village too. Thank goodness the nausea hasn’t set in! Although the smell {and look!} of fish is more than enough to turn my belly completely inside out. Of course, the look and smell of fish has always turned my stomach! Gross!!!

I’m also super impatient. How in the hell was I pregnant before? I’m impatient for my first ultrasound, to hear little bean’s heart beat, and to find out what sex little bean is. Boy or girl, it will most definitely be loved! Although I do have a secret desire for a girl, only because Matt says this is our LAST baby and I would like to have a daughter too. Boys are amazing, don’t get me wrong, but I’m hoping for that little girl – the outfits, the girly things, watching her be daddy’s little girl…so sweet! Plus it’s due time someone on Matt’s side had a girl!!! But if little bean happens to be a boy, then so be it! I’ll be just as happy with two little boys as I would be with a girl and a boy.

So, there you have it! There’s my big secret 😀 our big secret! Nolan’s known for quite some time. He keeps rubbing/tapping my belly and saying “baybeee!” So cute!

I have a feeling the next 9 months are going to fly by.

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Take THAT, apartment!!!

Over the past little while, I haven’t been on top of my “domestic duties”, so to speak. I know, this confession is shocking coming from me, huh? The one who actually believes in the 50s housewife mindset {to a degree, anyway}. But it’s true! I’ve been slacking, and then some! The soles of my slippers are caked in squished raisins – and that tells you about the cleanliness of my kitchen floor right there.

For the past week, I’ve been super lazy and tired. I think my iron is low – actually I know my iron is low. I don’t get nearly enough red meats, nor do I eat anything else high in iron. So I’ve been lazy, spending most of my afternoons doing nothing but cuddling up my baby boy and reading stories to him. During his nap time, I also nap…or have been, anyway. Our bedroom was a laundry war-zone, piles of dirty scattered about on the floor and baskets of clean stacked high to the ceiling. I was too lazy to fold the clean laundry, and thus didn’t have any baskets for the dirty laundry. Nor did I have any room in the baskets for more clean laundry so I couldn’t just toss it into the washer and dryer to get rid of it. No, that would mean that I would actually have to fold some of the clean clothes. I did manage to stay on top of the dishes, more or less. After all, we don’t have a dish washer and even at my most laziest moments I can’t stand having dirty dishes in my sink. So, go me for that at least!

Yeah, I’ve been the definition of lazy. Even my blogging indicates that, and that’s totally okay. We’re all entitled to moments {er, in my case, weeks} of laziness. I prefer to call it “weeks of rest”, thank you very much.

In any case, I’ve broken out of the fog spell and slapped myself upside the head. I am the one who does the majority of the cleaning {okay, all of it – although hubs does help me tidy up toys in the evening}, because I am the one that gets bothered most by mess and dirty things. I’ve mentioned thousands of times before that Matt does not see messes the way I see them. He’s blind to them. They don’t exist. The man will cook a fantastic dinner, but leave all of the dishes on the counter. I’m lucky if some of them make it into the sink. So, if I’m the only one who does all the majority of the cleaning, you can bet your socks that our apartment needed my love and attention. So this morning, I gave it just that.

A huge chore for me was the recycling under the sink. We have a little blue recycling bin that is supposed to be taken out to our big recycling bin outside when it gets full. However, our big recycling bin is currently buried under tons of snow, I’ve attempted to make Matt dig it out several times before but according to him “it’s frozen to the ground and if he tries to get it out the bottom will come out.” So, we technically don’t have the use of a big recycling bin. I keep forgetting to go to Walmart and pick up a new one {that will we store in Matt’s truck cab}, not to mention Matt missed recycling this week. {He claims it doesn’t matter, because he didn’t have anything to put all the recycling in anyway – since our big bin is, again, buried}. Trust me when I say that the recycling literally piled up to the point where you couldn’t even open the cupboard doors under the sink without tons of it falling out at you. And I kept leaving it, thinking that Matt would deal with it. Pfft, yeah right! Matt deal with a mess?!? Even with my constant bitching about it, it stayed under the sink. He kept saying “oh, I’ll put it all in bags and put it in the back of my truck for now”.

Guess what I did today? I put all of the recycling in bags and then brought it out to Matt’s truck and tossed it in the cab. Now, the cupboard under my sink looks exactly how it’s supposed to…like this:

And Matt’s truck cab is loaded up with bags full of recycling, waiting for the day when we finally get our asses to Walmart to buy a new big recycling bin. Which, if I have anything to do with it, will be happening very soon. I think it looks really trashy {snort, trash…get it!?} and I want that dealt with ASAP. While it brings me such joy to see Matt’s truck cab full of recycling, that joy is dampened by the facts that a) he doesn’t drive his truck during the winter so what kind of punishment is that anyway? and b) as I said, it’s totally trashy and I hate trashy.

So, yeah. That was a huge chore for me this morning. Plus I cleaned the entire kitchen and washed the floors {and picked all the squished raisins off my slippers}. Then I cleaned the bathroom and our bedroom. I’m catching up on laundry {nearly there!} and I’ve vacuumed the livingroom. Our apartment is slowly being restored to it’s original glory, and I love it!

I don’t know why I allow myself to get in lazy moods like that. It doesn’t happen often, but when it does the mood drags on and on and on. Seriously, weeks of laziness? What the hell, me?

I’m glad I finally gave our apartment some tender loving and care, since Matt would like to have his college friend, G, and G’s girlfriend over for a “fondue party” tomorrow night. I’m game because chocolate fondue is bomb! And yes, I know, I should have recruited his help because he wants to have the fondue party, but guess what? I’m sure I’ll be making him clean something in preparation for this “fondue party” – our apartment never stays clean for long!

When I say that Matt doesn’t see messes the way that I see them, I mean simply that. He doesn’t see them. If I tell him to clean something, he’ll do it. I know, the recycling was just him being super lazy and probably unable to see how or where we could store all that recycling without pissing off our landlords {he was thinking truck bed, I was thinking truck cab}.

The best thing about being a stay-at-home-mom is that I only have myself to report to. Matt is completely fine with messes. I, on the other hand, not so much. So the only person I piss off when I get lazy is myself. I don’t piss off any managers or bosses, and I don’t loose my job for slacking. So basically, I can be lazy and still “have a job”. It’s awesome. Plus when I’m feeling lazy and not wanting to clean, it just gives me even more time to read stories to Nolan and play with him. We’ve had tons of snuggles this week!

Oh and by the way, I found Nolan’s other snow boot…it was stuck in his snow pants. So Nolan didn’t actually lose it at all. Mom fail? Totally. Oh well, he doesn’t seem bothered by the misguided blame at all 😉

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Bad Mood Bear

I am in a bad mood today. I’m stressed, anxious, and exhausted. I’ve had far too many late nights over the past little while and needless to say…they’ve caught up with me! Today has kicked my ass and then some, and despite my nap this afternoon I’m still dragging ass and grouchy.

I barely got any sleep last night, between Nolan’s sleep crying and my back. My back was causing me murderous pain, probably because of the way I was sitting during our evening TV watching. So from 2am-3am, I tossed and turned and whined. I ditched my pillow even. Finally I fell asleep, but it was NOT peaceful.

Then my morning started off with the walk-in-clinic “re-dial” game. I wanted to book an appointment for myself and Nolan. The walk-in-clinic we usually go to opens at 1pm and at 9pm you can call and book an appointment for that day. Monday mornings are always rat races, I played the “re-dial” game for literally half an hour. When I finally got through, I tried to book an appointment. I gave the receptionist my name and she instantly interrupted me.

“You owe us for a foot clinic you missed in May. We won’t be able to see you until you pay the $70 charge.” this was said in an icy, short tone {after I was interrupted}.

“Ok…but I don’t have $70 today…” was my response, because I don’t. I was about to ask if I could still be seen with a promise to pay this Friday, but didn’t get far at all because I was again cut off.

“We won’t be seeing you until you pay the $70 charge”.

Ok then.

I was deeply irritated because this foot clinic thing is bogus. I signed up for it, yes, but I never received a call. {Who knows, maybe I did but at the time we were living with Matt’s dad & step-mom, I often didn’t get calls}. I guess I just forgot and assumed they weren’t doing it since I never got the call.

And to me, $70 seems VERY excessive for a missed foot clinic appointment, and the receptionist shouldn’t have had a bitchy tone with me. You catch more bees with honey, not vinegar.

Obviously I’m going to pay this fine, despite the fact that I think its WAY too much for a missed appointment AND despite the fact that they never clarified that “missing” their foot clinic would result in a fee. But I’m still mad about it.

So that put me in a foul mood from the get go. Mostly because I’m feeling insanely guilty for the amount of unnecessary I spent in the last month that shouldn’t have been spent. The tattoo, my hairdo, the three times I went out for lunch with Nolan, the pizza we didn’t have to order, and the 26er of vodka I didn’t need to buy are all weighing heavily on my mind. The fact that we’re tapped until Friday because I slipped up so much also weighs heavily on my conscious.

Throughout it all, Matt isn’t angry with me. Despite the fact if the tables were turned *I* would undoubtedly be infuriated with him. But I don’t let him make mistakes like that, so why do I let myself?

I’m just having one of those days where I need to pout and feel sorry for myself just because I know I screwed up. I know I should have been smarter about our money. I really don’t think I’m to blame for the whole missed foot clinic thing, but I also don’t think they’re entirely too blame either. It just sucks. Especially since I’ve been in several times since May with Nolan and they never once mentioned this fee to me. Or it would have been paid by now {because I usually don’t suck THIS much with our money}.

I still have another four hours to get through before I can fall into bed and call it a night.

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I’m Bored. Again.

I’m bored with this blog, again. It just feels…blah. I don’t know what to do in order to bring it back alive. I’m too lazy to re-do the whole look ~ besides, I like the look. I’m pretty sure it’s just me. My writing feels dry and boring lately. Sorry for that.

There’s a lot of stuff that I’d love to write about, but I feel like I can’t. I have fears that writing these stories would open myself up to opinions and feedback that I frankly don’t want. So I remain hush hush about it, and reframe from writing. About that, anyway.

Winter is boring, and in turn I feel boring. We haven’t gone on any great adventures, we haven’t done anything miraculously fun. We mostly stay home, because it’s too bloody cold to go anywhere fun. Sure, there’s the mall, but it’s totally depressing when you go and don’t buy anything because it’s not in your budget and we’re on a saving rampage, so what’s the point? Our mall doesn’t even have a fun playground, or even a photobooth to waste time in. It’s just stores and a food court. Oh joy.

I long for spring, so that we can go to the park and actually do something fun. I’m totally dying here of cabin fever and boredom and there’s nothing I can do about it. I’d love to be able to jet down to visit family for a bit and just have a change of scenery, but Matt’s in school 5 days a week and I work 4 days a week. My only day off is Wednesday, smack dab in the middle of the week. I suppose I could leave Friday afternoon, and head back up Monday morning, but the drive is always sketchy. We have to go through several storm belts and I’m sure I’ve expressed my fear and anxiety about driving during snow storms of any sort.

If it wasn’t so bloody expensive to take a train, I would, and if it didn’t take all day to bus down, I would.

I’m missing my family and my friends, and I’m bored with everything right now. I’m in a funk that I’m trying to claw my way out of. Nobody willingly wants to be in a funk, it just sort of happens. Am I right?

I know the groundhog didn’t see his shadow and predicted that “spring would be here before we know it“, but I highly doubt that’s true. I wait for spring to be here every minute of the day…but it’s only the beginning of February. We had snow storms in early May last year.

Clearly, Northern living is not for this mama. But I do like this town…when it’s not covered in snow and ice and other winter yuckiness. And I am trying to suck it up. I know people {JD especially, or maybe only} hate when I complain about snow since I live in Northern Ontario. Snow is just a fact of life. And I do deal with it pretty well, for the most part. I like never complain to Matt or my family or anybody except you poor folks. Sorry about that. I know if I complain about how cold and boring it is here, Matt will feel super bad. It’s not his fault I suck at Northern winter living. Northern spring and summer living? Totally rad. There is so much to do here it’s a bit ridiculous. But there’s not really anything fun to do during the winter months, and the winter months drag on and on because of it.

This Saturday, I’m going to take Nolan to the EYC. Even though I find Saturday’s at the EYC to be extremely overwhelming {there are so many people}, I think we need to get out of the house for a little bit. So, I’ll grab a coffee and suck it up. Nolan doesn’t mind crowds, even if I do. And since we don’t have plans for Saturday, why not?!

Blarg. Sorry for being so dry and boring around here. My blog is beginning to resemble my hands! So dry. My hands aren’t boring but winter sure is.

P.S. Did I mention I am not a fan of winter?

P.S.S. I fully expect some hate-comments from JD for this post. But oh well; I’m sure she’s just as tired of trying to navigate snowy, icy sidewalks with a baby stroller. And the bundling up before any outing, no matter how quick.

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QUITTER!

Sometimes, quitting things is good right? Like quitting smoking. They practically hand you an award if you quit smoking. Or if you quit drinking, you get one for that too.

I highly doubt I’ll get an award, or even a pat on the back, for quitting the gym though. In fact, I can already hear y’all now, trying to convince me not to. But…I just can’t do it.

I went to the gym today, and was all excited about it, then nearly got into a car accident on the way there. Although it wasn’t snowing when I left, the roads were absolute crap and there’s always one person {aka me} who doesn’t know how to drive in snow. Okay, so it wasn’t my fault. The person in front of me clearly had better snow tires and clearly wasn’t thinking about the possibility that I might not have amazing snow tires, so when they tromped on the break and I did too, I didn’t stop as quickly as I thought I would. Luckily, there was no collision. But my heart was still in my damn throat.

Have I mentioned winter driving, and snow, terrifies me?

Anyway. We arrived at the gym and I dropped Nolan off at the daycare, got my stuff in the locker, grabbed my water bottle and iPod and headed out to work out. Only…I couldn’t do it. I tried all of my machines and my body just was not cooperating. I tried over and over again for 20 minutes to make my body cooperate but it wouldn’t and I was frustrated. So I grabbed my stuff, my kid, and I left.

And I want to quit. I am going to quit.

It seems like every time I go, I get worse and worse at it.

I’m not quitting my get fit goal. I’m just going a different route. I’d much rather work out from home, and pay peanuts for peanut results. I’ll be putting all this money into a membership and I can grantee you I won’t be getting the results I want because my body doesn’t work that way. At all. If I buy work out videos and do them in my own home, at least I’ll be more comfortable and I won’t beat myself up if I can’t do something “the right way”.

So, in summary? I suck. And I’m okay with that. Because I don’t want to kill my body. I couldn’t even sit on the damn floor to play Megablocks with Nolan! I haven’t cleaned our apartment since I started working out, because I’ve been so sore and exhausted. It’s absolutely disgusting. Even when my friend Bruce visited, the apartment was not nearly as clean as it normally is for guests. Hells, it wasn’t even as clean as it normally is for us.

I’ll be quitting the gym and buying a couple of workout videos. Suggestions for workout videos are most definitely welcome.

So far, today has been crappy. There’s still time for it to redeem itself though.

I also didn’t go to Winners because now it’s snowing and the roads are a mess and I’m anxious. I really failed today.

Now, I need to go clean this disgustingly messy apartment.

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The Details

This morning, I woke up feeling heavy and groggy. All I wanted to do was pull the covers back up over my head and sleep for a few more hours. Obviously, when you have kids who are already awake, you can’t do that. By some miracle, I managed to drag my heavy, groggy ass out of bed and make it into the bathroom. As I went about my morning routine of teeth brushing, face washing, and hair/makeup, I started thinking about the day ahead of me…and going to the gym for that orientation after the girls’ get picked up. Suddenly, I started to feel panicky again. I started thinking about the little details – the drive, for one, is a panic-inducing aspect. It’s snowing – again – today, and finding parking at the hour of night I’m going is absolutely ridiculous. Trust me when I say I hate driving in the snow, and I hate searching all over for a damn parking space, and I hate parking. Then I started thinking about when I actually get into the gym, with Nolan. Panicked thoughts raced about my head a mile a minute.

Should I wear my workout clothes there, to elevate “change time”? I don’t even have proper workout clothes! I have black, crappy sweat pants that are literally flood pants and Matt’s t-shirts to pick from. I’m totally going to look like scrubby bum! Where am I even going to put my crap? I know they have lockers, but what if someone steals my keys, or phone, or something? Then what would I do!?

I actually had to grasp onto the bathroom sink to steady myself, as I was dizzy. I texted Matt with my locker dilemma and he said he leaves his stuff in the locker all the time without a lock. But I know he wears his shorts, and I know there are pockets in his shorts for the really important things like his wallet and his keys and his cell phone. I don’t have pockets in my crappy, flood pant sweats.

But, this is what I do. I freak out over tiny, insignificant details because at the time of {like, right now}, they really don’t feel insignificant. They feel like giant mountains that I can’t get past, even if you see them as ant hills, I am thinking: if someone steals my keys, how will Nolan and I get home? If someone steals my wallet, well then I’m super screwed because it holds all the important documents like my license and our health cards. If someone steals my phone then I’ll be screwed because I’ll have to either cancel my plan {which is expensive} or buy a new phone {which is expensive}. Both things are {expensive} not in our budget.

It’s bad enough that I’m already panicking about going because I have nobody to go with, but damnit self, can’t you give me us a break?!

Somehow, I need to overcome this. The only way I can think of overcoming it is by going tonight with no if’s and’s or but’s. My gym bag is already packed {although I don’t have a water bottle, I need to invest in one of those}, and I’ve at least solved the whole wallet-dilemma: I’m going to lock it in my glove box compartment in my car. Obviously, I can’t lock my keys in there and I really shouldn’t lock my cell phone because it would totally freeze, but at least I don’t have to worry about super important documents going missing from my wallet {because I really don’t have any money in there for anybody to steal. No credit cards, either!}

I was super pumped for Matt to download a bunch of new music so I could make a “workout playlist”, but he totally forgot and I can’t find my iPod anywhere 😦 I don’t think I’ll need it tonight, thankfully, because it’s an orientation so I’m sure I’ll need to pay attention.

But, anyway. Yeah, I’m going tonight, but I’m totally freakin’ the hell out over everything and anything. This would be so much easier if I had a work out buddy!!!

THIS JUST IN: I texted my friend Sammi, who I know has a gym membership because she tried to get me on board a million years ago, and…she’ll be there tonight as moral support! I know she’s already been through all the orientations, but she’ll go with me to elevate some of the stress I feel over the whole “new social interaction” thing! This makes everything so much easier, although I’m probably going to text her a thousand questions {like what I should wear, for one. Maybe I’ll wear leggings and a long sweater? Or is that too “dressy” for the gym!? I’m just not looking forward to wearing flood pants.} Now I’m excited, because Sammi is awesome and I’m less nervous about going 😀

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Notes to Nolan {21 Months}

My beautiful little man;

Today you are 21 months old, which basically means that you will be two in just three months. In three months, I will have a full fledged toddler. I mean, you’re a toddler now – I guess. Technically speaking, since you’re under two you’re still a little baby to the world. You will always be my baby, to me, but to the world you have to grow up out of the baby stage. After all, your mama can’t be changing your bottom when you’re 35, right?

Speaking of changing your bottom…your daddy and I are thinking about starting potty training. Thinking being the operative word here. You already have a potty – a sit down one, but you haven’t peed in it yet and every time you get off it you put it on your head and wear the inside part like a hat. This might pose as a problem when you actually do figure out how to go in it…so I’m kind of concerned and wonder if we should switch to a potty seat, the one that goes on top of the toilet. You have peed in the toilet once and you liked it – it was before you got into the bath one night and Daddy noticed you making your “pee stance” so he picked you up and you peed in the toilet. I missed it, I was at work at the diner that night, but from what I hear you absolutely loved it and thought it was hilarious!

Another thing we’re thinking about doing is purchasing you a toddler bed. Today we went to Walmart to check them out, and you weren’t sure at first but then you had fun climbing in and out of it. Which made Daddy say “let’s hold off for a bit…” LOL! He doesn’t really adore the idea of you being able to get in and out of bed so easily. We’re in no rush to buy the toddler bed, because you are still very content in your crib. You go down so lovely! Sometimes, you put up a fight but it’s never for long. You’ve made no attempts yet to climb out, and hopefully {knock on wood} we still have a few months of no-break outs. I’m also not in any rush to put you in a toddler bed – it’s just another sign that my baby is growing up faster than I can accept.

You have always had a strong, happy, vibrate personality, and for that I’m thankful. One of my fears is that I’d have a boring child. Who wants a boring kid?! You’re so fun, so I never have to worry about that. You constantly make Daddy and I laugh with your crazy antics. Your love for books melts my heart – I’m pretty sure we read about 10 books a day, at the very least, together. I often catch you reading to yourself too, while you’re playing independently.

I honestly love watching your imagination grow. I love how you talk to your stuffies, to the cat, and how you make your little toys talk to one another too. You learned the last part from watching T play, but it’s still super awesome how quickly you picked it up!

Another thing that you’re picking up quickly on is talking, in sentences. You’ve been “ahead” of your age group in a lot of ways. At 18 months, you were able to ask me “Where is Daddy?” and know exactly what you were asking {because you only asked when Daddy was at school or work}. The other day, you said “I’ma gonna bite you” before attempting to chomp down on my arm. While this mama doesn’t enjoy being bite, I certainly appreciated the forewarning and I was blown away by how clear it was. I could understand you perfectly. I’m excited to hear more and more sentences and words from you, and to teach you more words and sentences!

You are also quick to pick up on moods. If I’m upset or anxious about something, you crawl up onto my lap, gently touch my face and say “I love you“. Then you give me a kiss and suddenly whatever I was upset or anxious about seems so minimum. You give amazing hugs and you honestly make me feel like I’m the worlds luckiest mama {probably because I am}!

I can’t wait for the spring; I can’t wait to take you to the zoo for the first time ever, and Daddy wants us to go to the Science Center too. Our spring and summer will be full of great adventures with one another and I just can’t wait! I know you’ll love both the zoo and the Science Center – you absolutely love learning and looking at new things. You also love animals! Sketch is one of your best pals. You chase her all over the apartment, just to give her a hug and a kiss. Yesterday, you dragged a string around on the floor for her to chase. It was so adorable to see you playing together!

Another good friend of yours is T. I think she might be your first love 😉 whom I kidding? Any female is your first love. You are such a flirtatious little man! But really, you love hanging out with T. When she comes over, you light up like it’s Christmas. You constantly hug her and try to kiss her. After naptime, if she’s still asleep on the couch you’ll come over to her and gently kiss her cheek, then fix the blanket. It is so sweet! My little thoughtful man ❤

So, yes. You are amazing. Keep growing, keep loving, keep laughing and keep learning. I know I’m going to miss every day that goes by – because you becoming more of a child and less of a baby, but I love every step we take together.

You’ve made me into a better person, and I thank you for that.

I love you Nolan ❤

Love,
Your mama

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